Love That Serves in Marriage

Love That Serves

The Second Sunday after the Epiphany – 1/18/2026

John 2:1-11

Rev. Dr. Christopher W. Brademeyer

That portion from God’s holy Word for consideration this morning is our reading from the Holy Gospel according to St. John in the second chapter with special emphasis on verses one through five which read as follows:

“On the third day there was a wedding at Cana in Galilee, and the mother of Jesus was there. Jesus also was invited to the wedding with his disciples. ³ When the wine ran out, the mother of Jesus said to him, ‘They have no wine.’  And Jesus said to her, ‘Woman, what does this have to do with me? My hour has not yet come.’ His mother said to the servants, ‘Do whatever he tells you.’”[1]

Thus far the Scriptures.

In the Name of the Father and of the + Son and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.

Marriage is a gift from God. It is not an invention of human culture. It is not a contract devised merely for mutual convenience. It is a blessing woven into creation itself. Before sin, before death, before shame, God gave man and woman to one another. And ever since, marriage has remained one of the primary places where God chooses to bless His creatures with His presence, His provision, and His mercy.

That is what today’s readings set before us: a God who dwells with His people, a God who orders their life together in love, and a God who sanctifies marriage by His own gracious presence.

“If Your Presence Does Not Go with Us”

In Exodus 33, Moses spoke with a boldness that might surprise us. Israel had sinned grievously with the golden calf. The covenant had been shattered, and God threatened to send Israel on without His own presence. An angel will go with them, God said, but not He Himself.

And Moses refused. “If Your presence does not go with us, do not bring us up from here.” Moses knew something essential: blessings without God are not blessings at all. Land, prosperity, safety—none of these mean anything if God Himself is absent. What makes Israel distinct, what makes this people truly blessed, is not their strength or their success, but the nearness of the Lord.

This is true for marriage as well. A marriage may have affection, shared interests, financial stability, and outward happiness, but if God is not present, something essential is missing. This is not to say that there is a different marriage for Christians and for those outside of the Christian Church. Marriage is the same in its design for both Christians and nonChristians. That is to say, God gave marriage as a gift to all human beings in creation. But, Christians have the added and necessary benefit of God being present in them, their union, and the lives of their children. Christian marriage is not simply two people walking side by side; it is God Himself going with them. His Word ordering their life. His forgiveness sustaining them when sin intrudes. His mercy covering them when they fail one another.

Moses asked to see God’s glory, and God answered by proclaiming His goodness and His name. God’s glory is not raw power or overwhelming spectacle; it is mercy. It shown in the Lord who passes by sinners in mercy and does not abandon them.  That same merciful presence is what sustains a marriage. A godly marriage is not defined by perfection or constant harmony; instead it is marked by the Lord who remains with His people in grace.

Christ at the Wedding in Cana

This brings us to the Gospel reading: the wedding at Cana in Galilee. It is no accident that the first sign of Jesus took place at a wedding. Our Lord did not begin His ministry in the temple or the palace, but at a humble celebration of marriage. By His presence, He honors marriage as a good and holy estate.

And when the wine ran out, when joy faltered, when human provision failed, Jesus intervened. This is not merely a miracle about abundance. It is a revelation of who Christ is and what He brings. Where human resources are exhausted, Christ supplies more than enough. The water jars meant for purification, symbols of human effort and ritual, are filled and transformed into wine, rich and overflowing.

So it is in marriage. Every marriage reaches moments where joy runs thin. Patience is exhausted. Words are spoken that cannot be taken back. Love feels more like duty than delight. And at those moments, the blessing of marriage is not that the couple somehow finds new strength within themselves, but that Christ is present to give what they cannot produce. He gives forgiveness. He gives endurance. He gives joy that does not depend on circumstances.

The steward marvels that the best wine has been saved for last. This, John tells us, is a sign, a sign pointing forward to the greater wedding feast to come, where Christ the Bridegroom gives Himself fully for His Bride, the Church. Earthly marriage, blessed as it is, is a reflection of that greater and everlasting union.

Living Together in Love

In Romans 12, St. Paul describes what life together looks like among those who have received God’s mercy. Love is genuine. Honor is shown. Patience is exercised. Hospitality is practiced. Blessing is given even in the face of difficulty.

This is not sentimental language. It is profoundly realistic. Paul assumes that life together, including married life, will require humility, self-giving, confession, forgiveness, and sacrifice. The gifts God gives are not identical for each person or each relationship, but they are ordered toward the good of individuals and the whole.

Marriage is one of the primary places where this mutual service is lived out daily. Husband and wife are given different gifts, different vocations, different duties, different strengths. This is not for competition, but for mutual benefit and up-building. There is no place in a godly marriage for self-assertion, instead, learn from the Lord and seek self-giving. That is to say, husbands, put your wife ahead of your own self, loving her as if she was your own flesh as Christ loves the Church. Wives, love and respect your husbands. Submit to him as he serves you as your husband. Forgive one another. Seek the good of each other first, above all others. Stay faithful to your vows.

And for those of you who have not entered into the estate of holy matrimony, be faithful and patient in your singleness. Serve your neighbor, serve your Lord. Most of all, receive the gifts that our Lord gives.

And this life of love does not flow from human resolve alone. It flows  from the mercy of God that Paul proclaimed earlier in Romans. Only those who live by grace can extend grace. Only those who are forgiven can forgive. Only those who know that Christ has borne their weakness can bear with one another.

Marriage as a Blessed Estate

Taken together, these readings teach us that marriage is blessed not because it is easy, but because God grants His blessings through it. For us Christians, the Lord promises His abiding presence; the Lord who went with Israel goes with husband and wife. The Christ who attended the wedding at Cana attends marriages still, building them up through His Word and Sacraments in forgiveness and grace. The Spirit who orders the Church’s life in love orders the daily life of the home.

Marriage is not an escape from the fallen world; it is one of the places where Christ shows His mercy. And for those who are unmarried, widowed, or whose marriages are marked by grief or struggle, these readings still speak comfort. The ultimate blessing is not marriage itself, but the presence of God with His people, the very marriage of Christ the eternal Bridegroom to the Church, His bride. Earthly marriages come and go. Christ does not. His mercy endures. His promise stands as surely as He is risen from the grave.

Christ the Bridegroom

All Christian preaching on marriage must end where Scripture ends: with Christ.

He is the true Bridegroom who did not merely attend a wedding, but gave His life to claim His Bride. He bore her sin, her unfaithfulness, her shame. He covered her with His righteousness and promises never to leave her nor forsake her.

Every Christian marriage, blessed as it is, points beyond itself to that greater mystery. And so we give thanks today for marriage. It is not an idol, neither is it a guarantee of happiness; certainly it is not free from work. But, it is a gracious gift from a gracious God. A gift sustained by His presence, renewed by His forgiveness, and directed toward His glory.

In the holy Name of + Jesus. Amen.

 The peace of God that passes all understanding keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Amen.

[1] John 2:1-5 English Standard Version. All further quotations from the Holy Scriptures are from the ESV.